“He, I've got news! I am going to work abroad” I said to Ellen, one of my girlfriends who had been single almost all her life. 'What? What do you mean?' she responded. 'I am going to work at a University in the US” I explained. 'What about your son? she asked. 'Of course he is coming with me' I said very confident. 'And your fiance?' she asked. 'What about him?'
'What - does - he - say? She asked with very clear pauses between the sentences as if she already had an answer. 'I don't know, I haven't told him yet' I said.
'Are you afraid that he will disapprove?" She asked, again with a certain voice I didn't recognize in her. 'No, I don't think he'll disapprove, but..''
"But he won't certainly like it" Ellen answered for me.
It was silent on both sides of the phone. I couldn't understand why she reacted this way. And I think my friends' brains couldn't gather the information all together.
Overseas. Child. Father. Ex. Career. Love.
But more likely, she probably didn't know what to think of it. I thought that maybe she would be worried about our friendship and said to comfort her: 'Don't worry, it's only for eight months!'. 'Eight months?!!' she yelled, continuing: 'And what does your ex think about this?' as if the worldpanic broke out. 'Well, what can he say?' I sounded naieve..but not because I didn't think about his rights as a father, but just because of my girlfriend's reaction. And then, as if she realized she had been negative all the time, she put her things together and tried to end it in a positive way: 'Well, it sounds like fun'..with somewhat hesitation in her voice.. 'If you really go'.
Yeah. Sure. If I really go..
This questioning was going to be the first one in a whole line. I didn't quite understand. What was wrong with what I was planning? No personal internal conflicts made me take this 'huge' decision. I was not in a pre-midlife crisis or depressed or whatsoever, so I it was going to be a balanced decision. But 'the others' made me fear my move: my son would react badly, it would cause fights with his father because of the distance, and the separation from my partner might be bad for my love relationship. People immigrate daily and start new lives. What is so difficult about living eight months overseas? It's also overseeable. Was there anything I had to worry about?
To be continued...